Monthly Archives: December 2012

Happy new year!

Hope you have a safe and happy new year! May you start the new year with a positive outlook and a loving heart! Lets make 2013 the best year possible by thinking good thoughts, loving our families and helping our fellow human being! Best wishes to everyone!!!!
HAPPY NEW YEAR FROM Freddiejay!!!!!!!

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Controversy

I read a list of tips for bloggers to gain a following, one of these tips was to be controversial. The logic followed that people love a good argument and you can gather a lot of followers by voicing extreme opinions. There’s plenty of hot buttons in today’s world from same sex marriage to the old standby ,abortion, as well as a number of other things people feel vastly different about. I don’t have an opinion on what other bloggers will write about but for me I won’t voice an extreme opinion just to get readers. Anything I write is from my heart and some will like it , some wont. Some will agree while others disagree. I talk about faith, God, addiction and family as I see them. I will only give you me and ill leave it to you to like me or not but one thing is certain, everything you read is my opinion and my beliefs and life as I see it. It’s not for shock value or to jump on a band wagon. What you get is just freddiejay!

Busy, busy , busy

Whew! I’ve been running and jumping through hoops for two days and its catching up with me. I mean , my life is always hectic but even more so the past two days. In the hustle and bustle I got a very pleasant surprise yesterday when I opened my email. It seems that I was nominated for the award of most inspirational blogger. I don’t know how these things work and it really doesn’t matter but what is important to me is that someone thought I was good enough to be nominated next to some very talented writers. When I started writing this I never thought I was a great writer or even a good one but I figured if I could reach one person it would be worth the effort. I’m most grateful for the nomination but I’m so happy that someone, that anyone, found my words inspirational. When things get busy and life gets to moving fast its important to take time to appreciate the small things, the things that are easily overlooked. In my quest to reach many I could have missed the one I was reaching. I thank God for reminding me of what’s important and why I do what I do.

The Day After

We made it through another Christmas , here at the Freddiejay household we had a wonderful day. As the new year approaches some will make resalutions, I for one am going to try and eat a little healthier in the new year. I’d like to lose about fifteen pounds not because I’m fat but just to be a little more fit! I love fresh starts and I figure a lot of people are the same way. Will I succeed ? I hope so but if not i can make a new start the day after I eat some cheesecake. My point is, if I have one is that there’s always time to change. If there’s a resalution you have well write it in the comments, make a declaration to give it the old college try! Here’s to the new year and endless possibilities! I’m claiming that 2013 is my year, it’s going to bring many changes to my life and all of them will be great! Yes I honestly believe the things I write, just for today, believe with me!

Merry Christmas

It’s upon us, Christmas is tomorrow wether we are ready or not! The season is one of my favorites for many reasons but mostly to see my three year old react to the mountain of presents he has under the tree. I know it’s a day to celebrate the birth of Jesus but I don’t think He minds me heaping gifts on my loved ones. My day will be a busy one but that’s a good thing ,I’m at my best when I’m operating in the moment. I have no morale or lesson in today’s blog, it’s merely a Christmas wish from my family to yours. Hope you get the chance to see a child’s eyes wide with wonder or more importantly I hope you get the opportunity to be that child no matter your age. Merry Christmas to each and every one of you!

My Fellow Bloggers, thank you

I really have to give credit to this little community I’ve discovered since I started blogging. They really have given me quite a bit of support and I owe them an acknowledgement at the very least. When I began my blog, it was because I thought I had something to offer to other addicts or to people who have a family member or friend struggling with addiction. Along the way when people werent reading my blog I started to question if I really had anything to offer. I got down on myself and thought I should scrap the whole book idea and just do my construction job where I feel comfortable. Well, I didnt stay down and all it took was a few comments from people who took the time to welcome the new guy. First was Seyissandradavid a published author and one hell of a writer, then Steven Adlers mom gave me a pat on the back followed by Free Penny Press. Others have taken a moment to hit the like button and that little acknowledgement has helped to keep me working in an area outside my comfort zone. I’m a street guy with a high school diploma so writing is not my area of expertise but I have signed up for a writing course and over the next two years I hope to become a better writer but I would really like to tip my hat to those who have given me the courage to be more!!!

That’s why I do what I do

I work with other addicts and while its very fulfilling its also heartbreaking to watch them stumble over and over. Most people who attempt recovery fail their first time and some fail many times but what a glorious day it is when we finally get it! I worked with a young man who had a story very similar to mine, the only difference was the color of our skin and when someone’s story parallels yours it makes you try that much harder to save them. If I learned one thing in the past five years its that you can’t save someone from themselves.This young man lived in my home and was as close to my family as any member of the family can be, he stole some money from me and went back to drugs, on that day I cried like a baby , I questioned why I do this why I set myself up for heartache after heartache but I picked myself up , prayed for him and moved forward. I didnt hear from him for two years but yesterday as I was teaching my relapse class I heard a familiar voice call my name. I turned and there he stood looking at his feet, I threw my arms around him and we both cried. He has 9 months clean ,a beautiful girlfriend and a great job. He came to make amends for what he had done saying that the shame of it drove him to his deepest level of addiction but ultimately to his recovery. What a great day when an addict turns that corner in life and that’s why I do what I do. Special thanks to Jim S.who did the same for me.

What’s Left Behind

I do some little devotions in the morning, the books are bible based but from two completely different authors and when they match up as they did this morning I pay close attention. Both devotions were on what we leave behind and how we will be remembered. Will your kids tell your grandchildren that you were a loving parent that always had time to play or answer a question or will they say you were short tempered more concerned with work then family. I know we must provide for our family and its easy to get consumed with it because so many of us either work from home or bring our work home with us. It’s also easy to shew our kids away then it is to answer the same question five hundred times. Somewhere along the way someone prayed for me,my parents werent church types and I didnt know my grandparents very well but I’m sure that someone’s prayers were answered the day I hit my knees and gave up 25 yrs of addiction. I will take the time to pray for others, I will show my children a loving God by being an example of His grace and mercy. I will make mistakes but my children will carry from me a dad who tried to be the best daddy he could be. What will you leave behind?

Full Potential

I recently read a story of a man who having some problems with his vision went to the doctor and the doctor informed the man that surgery could make his vision better but there was a strong possibility he could be blind as a result of the surgery. He prayed and talked to his family before going for the life changing surgery, while he was under the doctor discovered it was just a fungus and removed it, the mans 20/20 vision would be restored. When he awoke and heard the news he claimed it was the greatest day ever.
Far too often something has to be taken or nearly taken for us to appreciate it. There are no guarantees in life with the exception that one day we will leave this body. If you knew you had 24 hours to live who would you call? Well call them today cause tomorrow or even the next breath is promised to no one! I write these blogs for you but I write them for me as well. God has given me so much and I don’t always appreciate it but today I’m going to try harder to live life to its full potential!

Sandy Hook

I’ve been thinking about it all weekend, I wasnt sure if it was something I wanted to start the week with or not. I’m referring to the massacre at the grade school that shook everyone of us to our core on Friday . I’ve seen a lot of things on the Internet and the television about this tragedy and how it should never happen again. I’m left with more questions then answers. I never want to hear this sorta thing again but how do we prevent it, do we make our children prisoners at their school making them go through metal detectors and checkpoints? I really don’t know the answers but I know it’s time we come together as a nation and put all our differences aside to answer some tough questions. One thing is certain and that is that life is fleeting and things can change in the blink of an eye so I’m gonna spend more time loving my family and less time being “busy”. My son can interrupt my work, he can bug me while I’m on the phone because today I have a clearer perspective about what’s important. Ill continue to pray for the parents and the kids who endured this terrible tragedy and ill also take the action of not letting a day pass without kissing my little boy. To the parents who lost a child I send my sincere condolences and my heartfelt prayers, may God see you through this time of great loss. To the children who I believe reside in heaven with God at this moment you will be missed.

bohemiaspeaks

a virtual scrapbook of an artist's mind

NZ Fiendishly Fiends Fabricated Withdrawal Fables

Methadone sucks. I jumped off 70mg a day. Illegally purchased from "street" sources, of course. And Sam McBride, addiction "specialist" in Wellington, New Zealand, is a complete knob. Turns out, after years of dealing with people all over the spectrum of addiction and those in the recovery industry white collar jobs, that a lot of others working around him are proving just as mind faltering wrong in their choice of profession. Sadly we, the addicted masses, suffer at their whim. Corporate, capitalistic whim it may be. But whim it is. Even though CAPITALISM ADDICTION could be argued as the worst problematic addiction. It's worse for the planet. Worse for people. Worse for happiness. "QUALITY OF LIFE" is something that needs hammering - it's really the be all and end all. If products or drug regimes increase quality of life for an individual, then WTF? Too bad. The ability to live a life is paramount. Complete abstinence is not for 95% of population long term. I base this on nothing. I made it up. They write they rules, definitely rules to the right. "QUALITY OF LIFE" is a measure of recovery. Quality of life is a measure of happiness. How many BMW's you own and spending two hours a day with your three kids and dog is probably not. I am not thick, yet struggle immensely with an answer to WHY? Why do they seemingly take solace in making your life, their business? Learning from people is a progressive societies best feature. Putting your head in the sand is not the same as bending over and showing them your asshole. "THEY CAN, AND DO, SCREW WITH MY LIFE BY A SINGLE STROKE OF THEIR PEN. THIS IS MY PEN. SUCK IT UP PEOPLE". Those who do not in the least find tank girl adorable will be offended. Punks, young people, tank girl fans will think okay. Spiritual advisor's and anyone with psych' qualifications should not think too hard and simply read the words on the page, without examining the mind behind. BOTTOMS UP.

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